Anyone wanna ask me something?
The man who didn't understand satire:
A while ago, my friend Joe and I put a video on youtube called “Interview with a REAL Serial Killer” Basically I play a serial killer talking about my life, and I basically blame my serial killing on music and television. If you can’t tell, it’s a tiny bit tongue-in-cheek. Just a little. You know, that parts where I pretend to be a serial killer and blame it on music and...
Everything’s going to Hell in a Bonham Carter.– Stephen Fry
At the end, it turns it out was all just a TV show, and we have to go back to work. I know, I’m disappointed too.
The war situation has developed not necessarily to Japan’s advantage.– The Emperor of Japan, days after the bombing of Hiroshima and Nagasaki. I guess he should be commended for not overreacting?
Americans who travel abroad for the first time are often shocked to discover...– Dave Barry (via 24freedinners)
Dumavale ran a hand across his sweaty brow, brushing a lock of his ebon hair...– An excerpt from the fantasy novel I’m writing (and clearly taking a little too seriously).
Anonymous asked: I love the 90's! and all of the things that VH1 tells me I should Love! What is one of your most favorite 90's memories!?
While I'm out of town...
ask me some questions that I can answer inadequately upon my return? (sometimes I speak like an 17th century British fop)
I’ve learned in comedy never to alienate the audience. Otherwise, I would be...– Steve Martin (via complicatedshoes)
chan-chan: Dolly Parton - 9 to 5 Man, Dolly had...
I was googling some magic tricks...
…because I have a vibrant social life. In the course of events, I came across this precious little aside: The old “Gasoline into Flaming Newspaper” variation of this effect, made famous by Kenton “Firefly” Burns just before his sudden retirement, is no longer considered safe enough for performance. I especially like the implication that, at one time, the old...
I found the least restful method of sleep.
Last night, I had some work to finish it, so, rather than finishing it and going to bed, I decided, at 10pm, that I had time for a nap. I set an alarm for 11pm. At 11 I hit snooze. At 11:10, I reset the alarm for midnight. At midnight I set the clock for 1am. At 1am, I set an alarm for 2:15am. At 2:15, I set the alarm for 3:15. At 3:15, I set the alarm for 4:15. At 4:15, I set the alarm...